Friday, August 22, 2008


I am back from moving my daughter to college. That was really, really, exhausting and hard. John and I totally over-compensating with making sure she has everything. Turns out its hard to leave your kid in NYC. Not for her. For us. She has most definitely got everything she needs thanks to several hundred shopping trips every time we thought she didn't have something she MIGHT need.

John gave and endless narrative of supposedly helpful tips. Last minute parental guidance. 2 1/2 days of it until Lisa and I thought we might just run away screaming and pulling our hair out! He went over and over and over the grid which is NYC. In our final moment with Lisa he was staring at floor and said "I was just noticing the grid of the tiles. If you get me some tape I can teach all you girls the grid of NYC." Lisa and I shared our final (doubtful) look of utter frustration with this man. I KNEW she would be fine. He couldn't wait to get home just so he would have an excuse to call her and say "I'm home." I guess he'd imagined her sitting in her dorm room doing nothing. Not the case. She was on the ferry back from the Statue of Liberty. She had taken the subway (alone), met some friends and went sight seeing. Sweet. I knew she would be fine. What would you be doing at 18 in NYC? And who didn't know it all at that age. We figured things out. She will too. Poor John. Lisa even mentioned the word "stalker" to him. I am pretty sure he will be a very frequent visitor to NYC. Maybe I should say POOR LISA.

On the home front...before we left I asked my 15 year old to make a list of anything special he might want from the grocery store while we were away. He was going to be staying home with his 24 year old sister. Here is the list the smart ass gave me:

Lots of nutritional value there among other things. Besides the fact that there isn't one square of toilet paper anywhere in this house everything seems to be intact. No evidence of a party. Which is really, all I ask.


Blogger betmo said...

so, what kind of beer did you buy him? :) hee

8/25/2008 09:59:00 PM  
Blogger Mariamariacuchita said...

HAHAHA!!!! Love the beer!
h, letting go and transitioning is hard on all, kids and parents.

I'm guessing you're such a great mom that she'll do fine, and be home soon to visit!

8/25/2008 10:06:00 PM  
Blogger Fran said...

Wow Mary, I have not yet crossed that bridge. Having the fledglings move out is one thing - to the big city is another.
I think I would give my kid a bottle of pepper spray if they were going to live in the big city.

My youngest just turned 20- he works full time & goes to school so although he lives here at home, we hardly ever see him.

He saved a bundle by doing so.
I don't mind being his support network, because it is not like he's out partying.... he is working hard.

He wants to move out, but his place of employment is going out of business. He works for a private contract security business, and they plan on keeping security a the building.... so his job future is in an unknown status. He's ina good position- if he loses his job, he may just go back to college full time- he's already go tuition socked away.

8/26/2008 01:39:00 PM  
Blogger Fran said...

BY the way-- nice grocery list.... you should have left him a "chore list"....

Clean garage
landscape front yard
paint the house
varnish wood floors
set up christmas decorations

8/26/2008 01:42:00 PM  
Blogger Human said...

Love the list. He's good kid. No evidence ;)


8/26/2008 03:20:00 PM  
Blogger Carol said...

I guess that's what you get when you ask a 15 year old for a food list. I can't imagine one writing things like "Lettuce, broccoli, spinach, and a little brown rice please".

I really admire Lisa. I KNOW that I would be intimidated - at 18 AND now - by landing in NYC without someone else to hold my hand and take me places.

8/26/2008 11:08:00 PM  
Blogger The Beltway B@stard said...

Never, ever, leave a note or a sign that says "NO PARTIES". My parents used to do that to me. Of course it became the center piece of the parties I would have anyway.

There was even one time I strung a 12 pack of empties from the ceiling, and attached the "No Parties" sign to it. Big hit ;)

I can sympathize with your husband too. I bet he knows every inch of NYC from the maps now. I have a few maps memorized myself.

8/27/2008 12:46:00 AM  
Blogger Krimo said...

Your kid is class, Mary!
Anyone who knows what Provolone is should be classed as a gourmet!

8/27/2008 06:17:00 PM  
Blogger Mary said...

B- Root.

Maria- I try hard to not be a worrier. It used to come easier. That was before kids. I'm getting back there though.

Fran- Sounds like you have a great kid. I would financially much rather see my children go to community and then a local collegeThere is just nothing at all happening around here job wise so I want to see them get away. They tend to want to stay near the beach and sometimes I think this is the only opportunity to get away.
You better believe I left him a to do list!

Human- He really is a good kid. He also has a great sense of humor. Much like mine anyway so I appreciate it.

Carol- I still want someone to hold my hand! I keep trying to tell my self I will go visit without John but I don't think I have the guts. What a wimp. I've really got to get over myself. A goal.

BB- That is SO funny. I can just picture it! I hope for your poor parents sake you left no evidence.

My husband barely needs a map. He's a city boy (DC) and seems to figure out any city pretty quickly.

Cream- It's the Italian blood.

8/27/2008 10:55:00 PM  
Blogger Ingrid said...

oh boy..i cannot imagine moving my kid to another town at 18 (of course not, he's 10), and when he went away for a week summer camp, I was really 'feeling' it. he did too at the end of it.. I know it's a process but boy, I'm sure it will be hard.. you guys seem like solid parents, nothing but solid kids must come from that..ok ok.. you have your smart ass sonny dearest..did it say beer? haha..
well, like you said, no parties while you guys were away..check! Daughter fine in NYC..check! 'Dad' adjusting..ehmm 'little check'??

I feel for you though!



8/29/2008 11:19:00 PM  
Blogger No said...

Yikes--my youngest just started kindergarten---and that was sooooooo though--can't imagaine what you're going through!!!

8/30/2008 09:23:00 AM  
Blogger enigma4ever said...

oh my...many hugs...I would be a sweet that you have raised such a lovely wonderful independent girl....good for you..

( love the list...too funny)

8/31/2008 02:11:00 AM  
Blogger Hayden said...

Lucky Lisa! What a wonderful time and place for her to stretch her wings!

9/01/2008 12:15:00 PM  
Blogger The Future Was Yesterday said...

"John and I totally over-compensating with making sure she has everything."
I think it's called "Love", and as I've said of your family before, they are fortunate. Love surrounds them!

John gave and endless narrative of supposedly helpful tips."

And Mom just "hated" the fact he was such a worry wart. Riiiight!:P

"I asked my 15 year old to make a list of anything special he might want from the grocery store while we were away. "
LMAO!!!! Mary dear, how dumb can you be?:) ROTFL!! Oh God, that cracks me up!:)

What was wrong with his list? He had nothing but health food on it!:P

9/01/2008 05:46:00 PM  
Blogger Mariamariacuchita said...

So how's it going now?

9/01/2008 10:40:00 PM  
Blogger just me said...

I admire your courage. I would be a basket case...well, more than I am already. You've given me an idea for a post..(!!)

9/02/2008 08:05:00 AM  
Blogger Mary said...

Just me- Shit. You top me in courage any day!

Maria- I am really, really so happy for Lisa. She reports in on the cool art classes and I am just so happy for her that she has this opportunity. My brother said "I wish you were my mother." I laughed and said "I wished I was my mother too." Really happy I could do this for her. She's fortunate.

TUA- I knew you'd get a kick out this.

Ingrid- Little check indeed. I don't think he even gets that! And yes Johnny is the king of smart assed-ness. Keeps me laughing.

E4E- the list is a classic. I think I should frame it.

No- Kindergarten is WAY harder than sending a teenager off into the world. Trust me on that one!

9/03/2008 09:05:00 PM  

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